031 Sometimes Actions Think Louder Than Thoughts

Episode 031 - Sometimes…Actions Think Louder Than Thoughts

The Influence Every Day Show with Dr. Ed Tori

Episode Overview:

In this episode, Dr. Ed Tori dives into an unconventional but powerful perspective on change: that actions can shape our thoughts, sometimes more profoundly than the reverse. While many self-help messages focus on shifting our mindset to drive behavior, Dr. Tori explores the overlooked approach of using action as a catalyst for internal transformation. Drawing on insights from thought leaders like Amy Cuddy, William James, and Robert Cialdini, this episode reveals why small, intentional actions may be the key to lasting growth in influence, leadership, and personal development.

What You’ll Learn:

The Power of Action-Driven Change: Discover why shifting your actions can have a ripple effect on your thoughts, emotions, and even beliefs, challenging the traditional “thoughts-first” approach.
Key Influence Insights: Learn from research and insights on how commitment and consistency influence belief formation (Leon Festinger), the role of body language in state management, and the science behind power poses.
Practical Application: Get a glimpse into Dr. Tori’s Influence Book Club, a community designed to help people transform insights from top influence and communication books into real, practiced skills. Practical Tools for State Management: Explore Dr. Tori’s resource, “101 Ways to Manage Your State,” which provides actionable strategies to help you take control of your mental and emotional state. Access it at DrTori.com/101.
Action as Habit-Building: Understand Aristotle’s wisdom on habit and excellence—why repeated behaviors define us more than occasional good intentions.

Memorable Quotes:

“Sometimes, action thinks louder than thoughts.”
“If you want to change your life, don’t wait for your mindset to shift. Start with the action, and let your thoughts catch up.”
“We become what we think, yes—but also what we repeatedly do.”

Key Takeaways:

Embrace the Behavior-First Approach: By changing your actions, you can influence your mental and emotional state in powerful ways. Smiling, adopting power poses, and managing your body language can change how you feel, not just how others see you.
Consistency Builds Commitment: As seen in Festinger’s theory of cognitive dissonance, our actions often strengthen our beliefs and commitment. Taking even small steps in a particular direction can align our mindset over time.
Join a Like-Minded Community: In the Influence Book Club, Dr. Tori not only helps others grow in their influence skills but puts action at the forefront, ensuring that members implement what they learn to create lasting impact in their communication and relationships.

Connect With the Influence Community:

If you’re ready to dive deeper into actionable influence skills, join the Influence Book Club at InfluenceBookClub.com. Be part of a community that translates knowledge into impactful behaviors, transforming influence from theory to practice.

Listener Challenge:

Think of one small action you can take today to influence your mindset. Strike a power pose, put on a smile, or take one step toward a long-term goal. Notice the shift that a single behavior can have on your thoughts and emotions.

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Episode Transcript

031 - Sometimes…Actions Think Louder Than Thoughts
The Influence Every Day Show with Dr. Ed Tori

This is Dr. Tori. Welcome to the Influence Every Day Show, where we make every day better and influence for good.

Today, I want to explore an often-overlooked concept in personal development and high performance. Typically, if you want to improve your actions, behavior, or skills, advice tells you to start with your thoughts. Just scroll through Instagram, LinkedIn, or Facebook, and you’ll see quotes and memes about how thoughts shape actions.

Many classic books emphasize this too—As a Man Thinketh or Think and Grow Rich—books about thoughts shaping behavior or bringing us the life we want. The same goes for famous quotes from people like Ralph Waldo Emerson, who said, “You become what you think about.” James Allen, author of As a Man Thinketh, said, “A man is literally what he thinks, his character being the complete sum of all his thoughts.” Mahatma Gandhi echoed this idea: “A man is but the product of his thoughts; what he thinks, he becomes.” Conventional wisdom often suggests that if you change your thoughts, your behaviors will follow. But that view can be limiting because it’s not always true.

Sometimes, we can flip that concept on its head. Our behavior can also profoundly impact our thoughts—even our beliefs. So while a lot of advice centers on changing thoughts for change, sometimes it’s about changing behavior first and letting the mind catch up.

This cause-and-effect dynamic is especially evident in influence, and even more so in body language. Typically, our body language reflects our internal state, but the reverse is true, too. Take Amy Cuddy’s research on power poses: when people felt confident, they adopted open, strong stances. This behavior became known as a “power pose.” But Cuddy’s research also showed that by striking a power pose, people could generate feelings of confidence internally—behavior influencing inner emotions.

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A similar effect happens with smiling. When we’re happy, we naturally smile. But research shows that if you force a smile, it can also make you feel happier, even by just holding a pen between your teeth to engage the smiling muscles. Or consider how our heart rate can affect our feelings. Sometimes, an increased heart rate makes us feel anxious. Other times, it signals excitement.

Our behavior affects our emotions and thoughts, and vice versa. So don’t limit yourself to just changing your thoughts to change your actions. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “You become what you think about,” but Aristotle also said, “We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.” Which one is true? Both are. Action and habit are powerful drivers of change.

William James, a psychologist and philosopher, put it well: “Action seems to follow feeling, but really, action and feeling go together. By regulating action, which is under our direct control, we can indirectly regulate feeling, which is not.” In simpler terms, through our will, we can influence our actions, and our actions then influence our emotions and thoughts.

Leon Festinger, the social psychologist behind cognitive dissonance theory, found that when we take steps toward something—even if it’s initially inconsistent with our beliefs—those actions can shape our beliefs. Dr. Robert Cialdini discusses a similar idea in his book Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion, explaining how commitment and consistency influence behavior and thought. Once we’ve committed to a path, we tend to stay consistent, and over time, our beliefs and feelings align with that path.

If you’ve held a political view or a deep-seated belief for years, it’s likely because of repeated actions over time—voting, supporting, discussing—that shaped your thoughts and solidified that stance. This is commitment and consistency in action. Behavior has molded your beliefs just as much, if not more, than thoughts alone.

This idea of behaviors shaping thoughts can be found across various influential books and studies—The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg, Amy Cuddy’s work on body language, Festinger’s cognitive dissonance research, and Cialdini’s principles. All of them speak to behavior influencing emotion and thought.

When I give talks on influence and persuasion, I highlight the importance of managing your state. Your body language, a reflection of your inner state, impacts how others perceive you. I even have a resource called “101 Ways to Manage Your State,” available at DrTori.com/101. Interestingly, 97 of these strategies involve actions, not thoughts. They’re behaviors that can change your state.

And this brings us to the Influence Book Club—a community for those wanting to transform their skills and behaviors, not just collect ideas. You may have shelves full of books or stacks on your Kindle or Audible that you haven’t read, or summaries from apps with bullet points and key takeaways. But do those summaries change your behavior? Not likely.

Books by authors like Chip Heath, Dan Heath, Charles Duhigg, Jonah Berger, and Robert Cialdini are packed with actionable gold—if you implement what you read. But knowledge alone isn’t enough; we must deliberately practice these skills. This is why I created the Influence Book Club, to help others develop these skills and, yes, to challenge myself to implement them too.

Stop trying to change your mindset first. Sometimes, you need to take the action, no matter how small, and let your thoughts catch up. If you want to improve your influence, communication, leadership, or relationships, then join us. The Influence Book Club is where we put ideas into action to transform skills into habits.

Sometimes, action thinks louder than thoughts. I’ll see you in the next episode—or perhaps in the Influence Book Club at influencebookclub.com.

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